Blog January 2019
Welcome back everyone! I hope you had a special holiday
season filled with good food and those you love.
We are going to pick up this year by extending some of the
topics that were introduced last year. One
way I will do that is to introduce a new component to our menu. I will
be starting to do podcasting by the end of the month. I will be speaking to professionals around
the country and the world who are graciously offering their time. The varied topics will be of interest to
parents, teachers, students and anyone who works with students. I have always had a dream to make professionals available without the high hourly rates. We have
such a wealth of information available to us, but often it is expensive to
access it. I hope to provide a forum for
knowledgeable and respected experts to introduce themselves, share their views
and provide a basis of information, so that we can then move forward and explore the topics on our own. We can access
that information and begin our exploration into issues which affect us on a
daily basis. I hope this “scratching of
the surface”, will give us a foundation of information and questions so we can
continue with our own legal, education, and health care professionals.
Last year we began by introducing many topics and approaches
to working with students as well as the
professionals who have developed and successfully applied their protocol in a myriad
of settings. Topics included the
importance of self-confidence or, as Albert Bandura called it,
self-efficacy. We heard from Rita
Pierson, who heralded the need for every child to have someone who is their
Champion and believes in them. I
introduced you to Ross Greene, Michelle Garcia Winner of “Social Thinking” and
I tried to give you a snippet of
information about CBT when I described the connection of our thoughts, feelings
and the visible behaviors in that result by giving you a visual with the triangle. We even heard from some of the struggling students, themselves.
With the Podcasts that will be starting in January, we will
delve into, more deeply, some of the related topics. We will speak with Psychologists and
Psychiatrists who specialize in working
with young people who have learning differences and educators who have developed
special materials and written books that address approaches to working with kids who struggle in our
educational system. And we will speak to
educators at every level and every aspect of our public and private education system. Lawyers will also stop by to explain IEP’s
and 504’s and what we, as parents and teachers should expect from the system.
Before I close today, I want to define several terms that we
will be using over the next series of Blogs and in the Podcasts. We speak often of the value of punishments vs
rewards. Everyone says “Natural
consequences are best”. So let’s be sure
we are all using the terms in the same way.
1.
Punishment
is a negative result of an inappropriate behavior that is not related in any
way to the behavior. Example: Your child swears at you so you tell him he
is grounded for the week.
2.
Reward is
a positive result of a wanted behavior that is not related in any way to the
behavior. Example: Your child gets all A’s and B’s
and s/he is given the promised money for each A or B. Note: As our children get older these kinds
of rewards become more costly and as their interests change, we struggle to find
something that they are willing/motivated to work for.
But, what if is not about motivation or
what we did or didn’t do? What if it is
about a lack of skills to deal with a situation or a reappearing problem. No form of punishment or reward can overcome
a lack of skills.
3.
Consequence
needs to be divided into two parts.
Consequence A is a negative result of
unwanted behavior that we may tell the child will happen, but is not related to
the behavior, very much the same as a punishment. Example: If you hit your brother again, you will have
a time out.
Consequence B is an outgrowth
of the behavior. Example: A child/student is rude to a teacher/parent by loosing his/her temper and swearing at the adult. The child is given time to calm down by removing him/her from classroom or asking the child to go to his/her room and calm down. The adult then speaks to the child about the situation and together they decide how to best move forward. Is an apology due to someone? How would they feel if someone responded that way if the child asked someone to do something? What process, words or signal could the child use to avert the situation? What exactly was so upsetting? And others reflective questions to help understand the situation.
I would like to encourage you to be in touch, by subscribing
to the Blogs and Podcasts at justeducationfirst.com and commenting on what you liked or may disagree with. Also, on who you might like to hear
from and learn more about. Submit
questions, topics and suggestions to help me plan as we move forward.
Thank you for staying with us. See you before the end of the month in our new podcast
series.
j
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